"We don't move even if sensei can't see us," said 13-year-old Grey Timberlake. "Because we use our integrity," said Timberlake, who excels in Aikido and mentors the younger children. "Integrity is kinda like trust - kinda like our conscience," he said. "It's actually a pretty good skill to use in life I think." Integrity. Honor. Self respect. Harmony. This is the language of Aikido and what anchors the foster children participating in Tapestry Family Services' after school treatment program.

Tapestry is a local full-service agency offering a unique blend of support services to area foster families. In addition to traditional foster care placement, Tapestry gives families paid respite care so parents can enjoy a few days of complete rest each month. Families also utilize Tapestry's full range of therapy services, mental health treatment for children, parent support groups and trainings. And woven into the program is Tapestry's menu of after school activities that tap the talents of some of Ukiah's well-known luminaries. Children can choose from martial arts, art lessons with Ada B. Fine, horseback riding with Esther Siegel and Kay Leiberknecht, mural painting with muralist Tobin Keller, gymnastics, swimming at the Coyote Valley Tribal Cultural Center, hiking Ukiah's oak-studded hills, woodworking and cooperative group activities and more. As an added bonus, children are picked up by Tapestry staff from school (or their homes during the summer break), and returned home after the program. All for free.

At the helm is Fillman, who works as Tapestry's activities coordinator and is a member of the National Martial Arts Hall of Fame and an internationally recognized fifth-degree black belt. In the time it takes to blink an eye, Fillman can flip two grown men in the air and have them land, splat on their backs. But Fillman's a major softie when it comes to children -- especially foster children who have had traumatic experiences and need to be saturated with extra tenderness.

"You showed incredible bravery today. And it's your first time doing Aikido!" Fillman beamed at seven-year-old Jessica, a wisp of a girl who harnessed every bit of her 55 pounds to expertly maneuver a kata tori (shoulder grab) on a boy twice her size. "Your Ki (human spirit, spirit of the universe and source of energy) is very strong," Fillman told her. "And I really appreciate your focus. You are gentle and kind." Jessica listened intently, hanging on Fillman's every word. Finally Jessica looked shyly at her teacher and asked in a tiny voice, "Can I hug you?"

After each Aikido practice, Fillman and Tapestry activities counselors Amy Aikman-Brower and Jeffry Harris give the children much-deserved kudos. Every child, one-by-one is given their moment of recognition, with a special emphasis on acts of honor, compassion, courage and integrity. Children are awarded up to three burgundy-colored chips per session, which can be saved and cashed in later for snacks, toys, sports equipment and art supplies at the Tapestry "store"- located at Tapestry's recreation headquarters at the former Mariposa School site on Low Gap Rd.

Grey Timberlake, 13, holds the record so far for earning the most chips - a whopping 800. "The chips encourage you to keep pushing forward and not give up," he said. Timberlake was introduced to Aikido through Tapestry and is now a role model for the other children and a martial arts sensation. He radiates calm as he teaches the younger children, laughs easily and has more patience than most grown-ups. It was a combination of Aikido, his sensei Gayle Fillman, the Tapestry program, and his supportive mother that helped Timberlake find his center. He talks about the benefit of learning how to breathe through tough situations and how to disarm bullies with a sense of inner calm.

"Before, you know if something really bad happened, I couldn't stop thinking about it," Timberlake said. "And I didn't want to talk about it. I was shy and felt like people were going to judge me," he said. "But in Aikido when we enter the dojo, we are supposed to come in with an empty mind so we can concentrate. So I learned how to focus and how to regulate. When I do Aikido, I am in the safe zone where I can go and not worry about other things," he said. "It prepares me to be more patient in life."

Timberlake loves the San Diego Chargers football team and playing video games. When he grows up he'd like to play pro football or "help animals like that guy the Crocodile Hunter." He does his chores and describes his mom as "awesome." But there have been hard times, too. Memories that never go away, experiences that are never deleted. And sometimes through Aikido and help from places like Tapestry, a child like Timberlake finds that safe space from which hope is born. "Now I work with the younger kids from Tapestry to help them with exercises to breathe through it if they have anger issues -- and how to stay calm," Timberlake said. "I can be a leader and offer them support and say to them, 'I've been though this. And since I made it, so can you.'"